Liebling

graduating today :)

[time] will come and we’ll find our way to each other, for life

and i will eventually get used to the beauty of your nearness

the comfort of the consistency

watering down the obsession i have for you

to pin-sized lumps in warm, home-style, soul food, soup

trickling down, warming the lips, the throat, pooling at the pit of the chest

dispersing heat that momentarily allows me to feel my insides

sudden awareness

of a space that’s always been there

now inhabited

coming alive

by a fist-sized trophy future

once perceived, [now] ingested

and made true on the inside.

like fire 3.29.13

these are the kinds of days where two showers are necessary

and sometimes not even enough

when you wonder if you’ve been eating more than your share

because you’ve bloated, and then you realise it’s the heat

and that you’re expanding

you’re pieces of matter after all,

even though sometimes you forget

it’s not pretty

to be in between two sizes

you’ve been here before

a nine year old

feeling sexless and free

only to come home to a mother telling you

that you need to wear something under your shirt

because your breasts betray the youth

that has been everything you knew

up to that point

and here you are again

wondering about the next shape you’ll take

it’s days like these where you try to escape your body

sleeping more often than usual

mind racing, impossible to pin down

to the one task you know you need to commit to

if you’re ever to leave this phase

you’re hot, molten metal

but your final form is still

peaceful, purposeful

solid enough to permeate

and to leave a mark.

the sun is testing you

and there is no way out of the heat

for now

to be enlightened, is to be lit

bright enough

to see through the shadow of the discomfort

emanating from the same source

oecologia:

“In March, due to a natural phenomenon, Siberia’s Lake Baikal is particularly amazing to photograph. The temperature, wind and sun cause the ice crust to crack and form beautiful turquoise blocks or ice hummocks on the lake’s surface.”

Photograph by Alex El Barto.

(via pisceswitch)

myidealhome:

those girly accents (via KiDS ROOm / FAIRY LIGHTS)

lifeofplaywithdiannadavid:

March 12, 2013

Today I decided to start speaking my truth. So, as manifestation has it, a (not so surprising) email surprised me in FB inbox. It was my niece who is a young adult now had insisted I continue my blog because she always found them inspiring. It was a nudge from the Universe. And so this is so…

I was quite hesitant to start speaking online. In fact, the cyber world was something I was afraid of. After an eye-opening discussion with some dear friends who said, all I see you do is post your events, classes and performances, I don’t even know who you are. People online now a days create relationships, you’re not just a company blasting sales and ads all over the place, you’re a person.

So Hello Cyber World…Nice to Meet you…I guess this is me…

So, in the later parts of last year I went on an internal search. I mean, if I wanted to stay up to date with the evolving times, be a contributor to the world, and be authentic, I definitely had some work to do. Time to start shedding some skin here baby. They said the world was going to end December 21, I think my new world just started then…as it did for everyone I guess.

By the end of this month I’ll be reaching my 6th month of devotion to yet again, understanding my new truths. Even more so, when I pulled out my calculator, at the end of March, I will be reaching my 10^th year anniversary from quitting my engineering job. Holy MFG! Yah!

Looking back at some of the things that have helped me in this journey, I wanted to share with you some of the things I’ve learned.

LIFE LESSON #1

ACCEPTANCE OF TODAY: In life we are either moving towards or moving away from something. Like this picture. I left engineering to go towards a dream to perform, teach and affect lives as well as towards my deeper understanding of my humanness to live in full acceptance with my sexuality.I was also moving away from a life of expectation, rules, and status quo challenges of what ‘success’ was suppose to look like.

Today, I can finally see that the journey towards success doesn’t look the same across the board. It wasn’t linear. It was a dot. A spot, a point. With my very logical mind, this was a hard one to grasp. I struggled with placing a label on me so that I could define an identity. Am I just a Hip Hop Dancer, an engineer, nope, how about a performing artist, what kind of artist, not a poor one, someone who makes a lot of money…is that possible?

The truest acceptance of success is the truest acceptance of where you are today, what you believe in today, what you are feeling today. Not right, wrong, good or bad, it is exactly what it is. That is the only truth that you know, and nothing else. So when we can live truly in the moment of full appreciation of what is happening right now, it will give us the answers to which direction we so choose to go from here. It’s like playing. You get lost in the moment, you love every moment of it, you’re fully engaged and you’re perfectly in the right place at the right time…or not and you laugh about it.

Stay tuned for more Life Lessons. Thank you Bea for inspiring me to stay connected and share my story. And so it shall.

you’re more than welcome tita D. as always, very inspiring writing and resonates with truths i hold dear in my soul but tend to forget often. this is something the internet helps a lot with, to keep us “close” and in touch with people who ignite our flames, fellow enlightened coals that help us burn brighter for longer when we stay together :D

i start a lot of sentences with “i wish…” .. i tried to change this by saying “i will” instead, but i’m in the stage where that’s still a bit daunting and it still makes me freeze in my anxiety… your post today reminds me that it’s only as simple as saying “I am..”

This is where/who/what I am, and I will choose to cherish and be happy with it. :)

06.02.13 “space”

i feel like

a cup holder

a door frame

there’s just an empty space

somewhere around me

or inside

i’m something but somehow

not this something unless

you’re there to fill the space

i was made to keep empty of myself

to make room for you

in who i am

#12 - “hat”

This is my lamp Pixie. That is her witch’s hat.

10 - “under”

we are under the moon, and it is under us.

#9 - out and about

me, my brother, and my cousins after a lunch buffet at Shang hotel Makati.

not my photo, an instagram photo by my lovely cousin abbie! (pictured here with the glasses)

had to break consistency because it was honestly one of the best out-and-about days of my year. :) love love love family.

#8 - someone you love

need i say anything more?

#7 - “stars”

One starry starry night in boracay, we were by the shore trying to capture how thick with stars the sky was.. It was so thick that I felt I could inhale stardust.

I wasn’t successful in capturing it how it looked, but I ended up with this one, which made it look like they were all shooting stars. So many wishes! So many dreams I can make come true with this photo!

#6 - your country/where you’re from

a series of local trips i’ve taken this year disables me from choosing just one! I’m so glad that Emmy is so culture-curious about my strange land. It’s taken me to places I wouldn’t have gone to otherwise this year!

anti-clockwise from top-right:

1.My family etc in traditional filipino (colonial era) clothing (isn’t Beardy cute in his filipino wear? XD top hat is priceless)! this was taken in Villa Tortuga in Taal.

2. Taal Volcano. Main Taal attraction. It’s a volcano crater in the middle of a lake!

3. Vigan! A place WAY up north (took E & I a 7h busride going, 13H coming!) nestled against the china sea. Colonial Heritage site. Old and lovely. Smells a bit like horse poo. :3

4. Some Taal fog for your faceballs.

5. Photo that captures our chinese and spanish influences in one place! I took this at the San Agustin Church in Intramuros.

6. Boracay sunset <3

#5 - “looking up”

..the macao tower. there is actually someone bungee jumping at the time this photo was taken!

#4 - “black and white”

I’m sooo behind! but today I decided to catch up on everything, and it’s been LOADS of fun!

Here is mister rabbit. He is drawn with black whiteboard marker and gets smudged every now and then because he’s beside the loo roll. He can’t help it, he loves sniffing things!

The photo itself isn’t greyscale but I figured the words are open for interpretation.